


Far From Perfect

by Kaskarden (KaskardenFluvia)



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Compliant, First Kiss, Idiots in Love, Lonely!Martin, M/M, TALK TO EACH OTHER GODDAMMIT
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-26
Updated: 2019-08-26
Packaged: 2020-09-27 11:20:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20406874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KaskardenFluvia/pseuds/Kaskarden
Summary: “What are you doing here, Jon?” Martin asked, not even looking up from his papers.“I need to talk to you.” Jon responded, looking down at Martin. He tried to keep the slight tremble out of his voice.“I’m busy.”





	Far From Perfect

“What are you doing here, Jon?” Martin asked, not even looking up from his papers.

“I need to talk to you.” Jon responded, looking down at Martin. He tried to keep the slight tremble out of his voice.

“I’m busy.” Martin swivelled around in his chair, turning away from him and reaching for another stack of papers. He started shuffling through them, and Jon could feel the temperature in the room drop. He stared at Martin for a while, but he ignored him.

“Martin, what are you even doing here?” Jon asked, gripping the edge of the desk and leaning forward, casting a shadow over Martin. This finally got his attention, and he eyes snapped up at Jon.

“Reports.” He said with an accusatory glance at the papers, before setting them down slowly. He gave Jon a tight-lipped smile. “And I _really_ need to finish this, so if you wouldn’t mind, let me get back to work.”

“No.” Jon said firmly and shook his head. “Not until you’ve talked to me. I’ve barely seen you in the last few months and the last time we actually had a conversation was before I went into a coma! Don’t you see what’s going on?”

“The institute doesn’t run itself, Jon.” Martin snapped back. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but there is more to this organisation than just the Archives. _Someone_ needs to keep everything in order.”

“But that’s not what you are supposed to do! You are _not_ the head of the institute.”

“Well, Peter – I mean, Mr Lukas – isn’t competent enough to do it by himself.”

Jon raised an eyebrow.

“Martin, we both know that that is a lie. The only reason he made you his assistant is to isolate you. You _must_ be aware of that. You may not have a degree, but you’re not that stupid.”

Martin bit down on his lip and Jon didn’t need his Beholding powers to know that he had just hit a nerve.

“I am aware of it, yes.” Martin finally pressed through clenched teeth and Jon crossed his arms in front of his chest.

“So, if you’re aware of the danger, what exactly are you still doing up here?” He let only the slightest bit of compulsion seep into the question. Not enough to outright force an answer out of Martin, but enough for it to be noticeable. He wanted him to know that he would get his answer one way ore another. It was cruel, but he needed to know Martin’s motivation. If only to save him from himself.

“I’m trying to _help_.” Martin said, narrowing his eyes in anger.

“Then come back to the Archives!” Jon shouted, slamming his hands down on the table, all of his pent up frustration suddenly coming to the surface. Martin recoiled at the outburst, his eyes wide. “You’re not helping anyone if you stay here. We need you Martin. Down in the Archives, not up here in this lonely office.

Martin didn’t respond, he just kept staring at him, his eyes still wide with shock.

“Please, Martin.” Jon’s voice cracked. “We- _I _need you. Come back.”

He wanted to grab him, either to shake some sense into or just to hold him, to make sure that he was still here, that he could still touch him. That it wasn’t already too late for him to come back.

There was an awfully long silence and Jon tried to hold back tears as he watched Martin chew on his lower lip.

“I’m sorry Jon.” Martin finally said. “I can’t.” His voice appeared calm, but Jon could see the slight tremble of his lips.

Jon felt his face go blank as his insides turned to ice. The feeling was quickly replaced by a boiling hot anger.

“Because _Peter_ doesn’t want you to? Or because _you _don’t want to?” He asked, compulsion drenching his voice. Martin opened his mouth to speak.

“Don’t answer.” Jon added with a smile and Martin’s mouth snapped shut, involuntarily, judging by the frustrated look on his face.

He turned, anger still bubbling in his chest.

“Jon.” Martin called, but he didn’t look back, he just started walking towards the door. He didn’t turn when he heard Martin getting up and did his best to ignore the quick steps behind him.

“Jon!” Martin repeated again and grabbed him by the shoulder, forcing him to turn and face him again.

“What do want, Martin?” Jon snapped angrily. “You made yourself very cle-“

He was cut off by Martin. He didn’t say anything, he just pushed him up against the door with a surprising strength, before crashing his lip’s into Jon’s.

Jon had wondered how it would feel to kiss Martin countless times, but never had he imagined _this_. It wasn’t soft, it wasn’t careful, but desperate and angry instead. It left him breathless once Martin finally leaned back again, his fingers still digging into Jon’s shoulders.”

“Was that clear enough for you?” He asked, glaring up at Jon, who could just nod, still too startled by the sudden closeness, the feeling of Martin’s lips on his. He clenched his hands into Martin’s shirt, scared that he would just disappear if he let go of him now.

“There is nothing I would rather do than go back to the Archives, Jon. But I can’t. There is too much at stake right now.”

“I don’t care about the institute, Martin, I just-“

“I’m not talking about the institute. Quite frankly, I don’t give a _damn_ about what happens to this place.” Martin answered, gently cradling Jon’s face with one of his hands.

“Then what is it?” Jon whispered, voice hoarse.

“I can’t tell you right now. Just that it isn’t about you, or me or the Institute. You’ll have to trust me on this.” Martin said, looking up at him. “Can you do that?”

Jon swallowed hard and nodded. “I will try.”

Martin smiled, the first genuine smile on had seen from him since before the Unknowing, almost a year ago.

“Can I kiss you again?” Jon murmured and Martin just pressed their lips together in response.

***

It was far from a perfect situation. Martin stayed distant, and steadily refused to talk about what he was working on. It was painful, watching him lose so much of his humanity in favour of some unknown goal, to trust him on doing the right thing, when Jon wasn’t even sure what right and wrong meant anymore.

But it wasn’t all bad either. There were the cups of tea appearing on his desk whenever he needed a break or the quiet moments in the break room late at night, when everybody else was either at home or already asleep somewhere beneath the institute. There were the stolen kisses in dark, foggy hallways, a comforting touch when he was having a bad day.

It was all Jon needed to keep going.

**Author's Note:**

> Jonny Sims please let them have a good ending, I know it's a horror podcast and it's supposed to be sad but please let the gays be happy just this once
> 
> Anyways, this is my first work for this fandom and I hope you enjoyed it!   
If you see any mistakes, let me know


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